A Sociology of Friendship and Kinship by Graham A. Allan

Author:Graham A. Allan [Allan, Graham A.]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Tags: Social Science, Sociology, General
ISBN: 9781000464054
Google: 11E_EAAAQBAJ
Publisher: Routledge
Published: 2021-10-17T04:26:12+00:00

Mrs Marsden

Mrs Marsden also lived on the council estate with her husband and teenage daughter. She is in her forties and works in a plastics factory some 4 miles from Selden Hey. Like Mr Grimley she did not really regard the people she knew as friends but was unable to find a satisfactory alternative label. As terms like ‘mate’ and ‘pal’ have male connotations, she tended to make statements like: ‘I’m pretty friendly with X’ or ‘Well, she’s not really a friend, but I get along well with her’.

There are three people Mrs Marsden is particularly friendly with: Audrey, Jean and Deidre. Audrey now lives a few doors up the road from Mrs Marsden, but they have known each other since they were children. While they only go out together rarely – and then only to one of the nearby towns shopping, or to a fete at the local church – they chat and talk to one another quite frequently. As her husband laughingly said – to Mrs Marsden’s obvious embarrassment – ‘Aye, the two of you are always spreading a little bit of scandal around.’ Mrs Marsden said she would ‘pop round’ to Audrey’s to borrow any household item she needed, but that they rarely went into each other’s house. ‘I have been in her house but we don’t make a habit of it.’ Nor did they interact together in any externally organised sociable settings. Their meetings were restricted to chatting in the street and on the doorstep, and to the occasional shopping trip.

Mrs Marsden has also known Jean for many years, through their both living in the village and through their working together for a time. Jean now worked with Audrey, and it was largely because these two had become very friendly with one another that Jean and Mrs Marsden had formed a close relationship. Mrs Marsden’s relationship with Jean was not as important to her as that with Audrey but was as limited. An interesting difference, however, was that Jean and Mrs Marsden entertained each other in their houses. Because Jean did not live as close to Mrs Marsden as Audrey, she could not be chatted to or gossiped with as readily, so interaction had to be arranged more explicitly. In this case, this involved Jean and Mrs Marsden (but not their husbands) visiting each other some Saturday afternoons for a cup of tea and a chat. Audrey was not included in these get-togethers. Apart from the occasional shopping expedition, usually with Audrey, planned interaction did not occur in, and was not defined as relevant to, any other context.

The factory that Mrs Marsden now worked in employed some sixty women. While she knew most of these sixty to different degrees, she was especially friendly with one, Deidre, who gave her a lift to work each day in her car. Still, they defined their relationship almost totally in terms of their work setting. This did not mean the relationship was only of limited significance, for Mrs Marsden got a good deal of enjoyment and satisfaction from it.

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